Still Stuck In Limbo

Surgeon confirmed some pretty gnarly scoliosis, but it's apparently balanced in such a way that surgery would be riskier than just leaving it alone for now.  The first pain management place I went to was pretty much...a fucking disaster.  Brought me in to tell me they don't prescribe painkillers there, only do steroid shots and that they don't do them for scoliosis or spinal issues...well fucking thanks guys, I'm gonna enjoy having to lie in bed for three days just for the pleasure of getting told to fuck off.  Ever heard of a fucking phone call?

So the surgeon is hooking me up with ANOTHER pain management place and hopefully they actually do what they're supposed to do.  Took my last tramadol just now and hey, pain is manageable enough to type this out.  Sure would like some more!  God forsaken hillbillys just ruining painkiller access for all us responsible people!

Some people would say this is good news, not having to have surgery, but...I still don't know why I'm in so much pain and I still don't know what's really wrong...what I love doing most in this word is still impossible, I'm still homebound, etc.  Yesterday was when I saw the surgeon, so...pretty big blow I'm still feeling the weight of, which is probably responsible for why this post is so morose.  Been nothing but one blow after another for over a year now...

I'll probably start leaning how to dictate using software next year, but...that's not the magic bullet some people seem to think it is, so don't expect books to magically be done in a few months once I start.  When you're writing a 200k book at 99% accuracy that's still two thousand errors.  And I'm a writer, not a talker, I could just suck at this.  The one plus is the King Henry Tapes are told in speaking style so...we'll see, I guess?

The software might implode the entire internet when I say Pougpaellieth the first time...

Don't expect any more updates for a few months at least.

Heaps of Bull****

So my doctor got fired/quit/leg-go/whatever-the-fuck.  Which explains the sudden "vacation" and why I couldn't get an early appointment while the new doctor found her footing.  Not sure if it's kosher of the medical office to not tell me this or to just spring the new doctor on me when I stepped in the door, but...

Am loving the new doctor, she immediately did what I'd been expecting to be done a year ago and hooked me up with both pain management (appointment scheduled in November) and a neurosurgeon (appointment scheduled in December).

Writing has been extremely limited to once a week max for a couple hours tops.  It's not just the act of typing, it's that I know I'm going to pay for it the next couple days and Tylenol just is not working any more, maybe never did.  I look back on what I pushed myself through to finish EVERCHANGING and it's just...what a mad bastard!  Did make the exhausted/beatdown Evelyn scenes pretty method though...

So anyway, hopefully the hook me up with a steady supply tramadol next month.  I have some I've taken during the worst days and it does a wonderful job taking the edge off, as one would expect.  Also blew through one a day for a test run a few weeks back for like...four days?  And I felt a ton better and was able to write for four hours a day every other day and that's actual progress I'd be happy with at this point!

After that...surgery of some sort, we can hope.  At least a huge steroid needle maybe.  Mmmm...spine needle.  Kinky.

Speaking of "paying for it", I'm gonna stop typing now and watch some TI 2022.

The Greatest FM Newgen I've Ever Seen

 More like Lapmygaud!!!

Quick Summary of September

Last Two Weeks Super Ungodly Melt Electronics Hot = No Write.

Next Two Weeks Not Hot Actually Nice and Pleasant = Hoping To Write.*

*Depending On How Much of An Asshole My Spine Wants to Be

Proof of Life August

Still limping around.

Working on new stuff when I can, but hurt the back again and have needed the last two weeks to recover, should be writing again next week.  I suppose I should be happy we've progressed to two steps forward/one step back as opposed to step forward/step back/stuck in place I dealt with from Feb to June, but annoying that I'm getting occasionally sidelined still.  Biggest annoyance is that obviously there's some things I CAN'T do, like picking up heavy objects, using a controller, etc, without hurting it and so I know to be very careful but sometimes...it just gets hurt and I'm not sure what caused it.  Was it sneezing?  Was it writing every other day instead of every three days?  Was it that I stayed up later than usual or didn't get enough sleep to rest the muscles?  Was it the hardcore bondage orgies?  So frustrating... 

Super miserably hot in Fresno even for Fresno.

Tried multiple times to get a quicker appointment at my doctor's but they're booked like crazy so I'm waiting another month to hopefully finally get hooked up with some specialists that can finally figure this out.

Another RR movie rec:  Thirteen Lives.  Fan-freaking-tastic movie making from Ron Howard.  About the Thai cave rescue a few years back.  Very understated and just let's the situation play itself out without any extra frills.  You just don't really need the extra tension when the fear of drowning and the weight of all that rock and just how tight those spaces are does all the work for you