FM5 Last Mini Tease

"Ask away, little dog."

ONE WEEK!!!

I put release on Friday so you could all read through the weekend if you wanted by the way, aren't I considerate?

FM5 Mini Tease #5

“Snappy, but not so scary when I can see your ballsack thinks this room is getting a little too chilly.”

10 Days!

FM5 Mini Tease #4

Fucking women in my life . . . why they got to be so powerful and terrifying, every single one of them?

We are now officially in the part of the editing process where I'm waiting on the beta readers and starting to get weird "naked at school" nightmares about releasing the novel with huge embarrassing typos.

FM5 Tease #3: King Henry Drives

I hooked a turn into the parking lot with the rent-a-car and slammed on the brakes, barely even skidding out as we came to a stop.  GPS navigator said it would take sixteen minutes, I did it in ten.  Shows what the fucking computers know.  Maybe I went through someone’s yard a couple times to cut some street signs . . . it was an emergency!

Ain’t quite a motorcycle with two uzis and a chick in an American flag bikini on my lap, but at least I got to drive for once.  Rented car with a nerdy black guy, a patrician with a stick up his ass, and a dead woman . . . I’ll take it!

As the car came to a stop, T-Bone gave a little scream—not for the first time—unbuckled himself hurriedly, and rolled his way out of the car as quickly as he could.

Welf followed, swaying to his feet and steadying himself with his stupid ass cane.

Only the dead woman seemed to be in the game, exiting like a perfect lady despite the man’s suit she wore.

I unclawed my fingers from the steering wheel, twisting the keys to turn off the hybrid engine.  Didn’t use any electric cruising on that drive, no we did not!  I kicked open my door and stepped outside.

There was a new dent on the fender.

Wonder what I hit?

“We’re still alive,” T-Bone wheezed to himself.  “Thank God we’re still alive.”

Two weeks!

FM5 Release Date, Cover, and Blurb

Release Date:

MAY 22ND!!!!!

Coverage:

If it's yellow, let it mellow!

Blurbage:

My name is King Henry Price.  Yes, really.  You'd think you'd be over that one by now.  I'm the only freelance Artificer in the Western Hemisphere, crafting and experimenting to make objects of unique magical power.  I'm also a geomancer, means I'm good at breaking metal, glass, and all the other important parts that keeps that box-like house over your head and not crashing down on it. 

Few months back I told my mentor and the money behind my Artificer shop to get lost.  Told her I didn't need her any more.  Some actions have unintended consequences.  Got a new partner now, T-Bone I call him, even if he hates the nickname.  Electromancer, makes him good with computers.  Not sure what makes him good at business, probably being raised by an accountant. 

Rebuilt my shop again.  One little fire-bombing, no big deal, right?  Doing things MY way this time around, rebuilt it as a comic shop.  Even got us a geeky employee at the cashbox knows too much about pop-culture for her own good.  But that's just the front, the fake, the illusion.  Real work is in the back.  Selling artifacts to all comers now.  Vampires, shapeshifters, mancers, don't got no choice. 

Can't complain.  Business is booming.  Life is good. 

Except for those unintended consequences...

Once again:

MAY 22ND!!!!!